Christmas Jokes

Favourite Christmas Jokes

The idea is to have a collection of good Christmas Jokes.

Do email in any good ones you may know to

Here are the jokes so far!:


Why is it getting harder to buy Advent calendars? 

Because their days are numbered!


Why won’t Santa visit Nigel Farage?

Because he only comes if you sleep, not if Ukip!


Who looks after Father Christmas when he's ill?

The National Elf-Service!


What does the Queen call her Christmas Broadcast? 

The One Show!


Why weren't Rudolph and Dancer sold on Ebay?      

Because they were two deer!

What do elves learn at school?

The Elphabet!

Why does Santa have three gardens?

So he can hoe hoe hoe!

What do you call a reindeer with cotton wool in his ears?

Call him anything you like - he won't hear you!

What does Santa call the reindeer with no eyes?


What does Santa call the reindeer with three legs?


-------- Thank you for the above 6, you know who you are! --------